More realizations about self-interior meaning my mind participation as imagination, back chat dimensions, continuing from day 49
So because I read Bible I thought it is a sick book, when apparently someone that is a messenger of good comes and than gets tortured and killed because he tells people that they should lay of on being happy by getting more and in that people start to fear the loss of that happiness and they kill the one that tried to `help` them and in that have a explanation that he died for their sins instead because of their sins and when I perpetuated this into current situation that the humanity has never evolved from that state by being happy with having more than because of fear of having less than and taking into consideration of the like to reproduce which lead to the current number of people and thus making this wanting to have more than multiplied with the current number of people and still backed by the very same system getting as much as possible and than me figuring out than the planet earth will eventually have to suffer us instead of live us will come to a point where human race will realize that we have sucked the life out of the earth because of our being happy by having more than or maybe I am just imagining this as I am writing, my inner voice.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that the inner voices of the mind are not self generated because of the horrific context they were attached to and I couldn't believe that I am capable of making such cruel realizations on my own due to knowing certain facts about how humans operate in the physical reality and in this being scared that it is somehow not my own fault for my imagination generated back chat instead of realizing that there would be no such backchat if it wouldn't be learned beforehand meaning there wouldn't be any information about it to back chat with, without experiencing it first, meaning that all my mind participation is strictly my own business and my own acceptance and allowance.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be afraid about the future of the earth on the collective scale instead of realizing that I am just making this up in my mind and my thoughts have no other purpose than to make possible predictions of reality and are solely generated on my own mind participation without anyone interfering within them meaning that the only external factor is sound, picture, smell, touch observation and that there is no possibilities for superimposed thoughts trough means unknown to me.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see that it is pointless for me to be afraid of superimposed thoughts even if they existed since that would than mean than I have no `freedom` in my backchat and I am somehow influenced by some supernatural external factor and in that I see no point of being afraid of the thought participation due to the fact it is no of my origin, and so whenever I see myself trying to put blame for my thoughts on external factor i stop myself with breath and within stability realize that I am only making this up because of me not wanting to take responsibility for horrific thoughts that may happen in the physical and in than would somehow blame myself and my thoughts for that physical manifestation when in fact it is only more a coincidental nature than an act of reality meaning that just because of thoughts that i have and were possible to really be manifested in reality it dies not mean that those thoughts were the trigger for real manifestation when in fact I can only be responsible for my thoughts and my action practical reality participation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that thinking had any influence on the movement of the real, when in fact to move the physical, physical action must be taken.
So in this I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see that the suffering is only caused with the physical participation in a manner that causes suffering and that manner is backed by the minds or wills that are apparently free to do it and have no consideration for the consequences that are than projected into the future due to the behavior of man and in that unawareness, man creates even more misery for future participants of the apparent life on earth.
When I was in one of those pondering I thought that the only way man could be payed back for all the suffering that is cause by one is to exchange the minds between bodies as in the physical program that to some apparently isn't real is recorded and than each and every living being would have to live a life of each and every living being so that all combinations would be covered and no living soul, being would miss out on anything so that all life experiences would be equally distributed, but that would than not be life but a mere repeated program/system manifestation going to infinity due to the enormous amount of beings that participate.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine that life is only a system that is repeated over and over again so that each living being could experience another ones life experience when in fact this is only another mind-fuck of mine whit which I was missing time of now.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that I am somehow special when in fact my mind is in essence the same as the mind of any other being and only programmed differently due to my acceptance and allowance of the knowledge-information that I have accepted and allowed to realize, learn, imagine.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see that mind participation doesn't influence physical in any way possible and that the only way to move physical is with physical participation-movement of the physical body.